And safety comes first.

Wednesday, April 20

Jesus shops for greeting cards at Walgreens. I saw him.

I used to be Buddhist, but now I'm a clerk at Walgreens, and this week the played-out hits of the 70s are only $7.99 on CD, $3.99 on tape. I've been stealing yogurt drinks from aisle 9, and I've been getting away with it. I mean, shit, if you're going to schedule me for fucking 6 o'clock in the morning, a sister's gotta get some breakfast, know what I'm sayin'? I ditched Buddhist school when my friend hooked me up here at Walgreens. Forget that wack Buddhism stuff, man, I didn't know what they were talking about--acceptance this, acceptance that. Man, that's all bullshit. What I couldn't accept was I couldn't accept my stomach being all growly and then being denied a breakfast burrito. Man, I owe my entire fucking life to Walgreens.

3 comments:

Mark D. said...

According to Pope Benedict XVI, buddhism is "auto-erotic".

Sarcasticboy said...

Just the fact that you think the 70's Super Hits CD is for sale for $7.99 proves you are full of shit. You don't work at Walgreens. If you worked at Walgreens, you would know that the junk CDs there are less than 5 bucks. I read your blog almost daily, dedicated over four minutes of my precious day reading through what I thought was highly insightful and truthful words. And now you pull a stunt like this on us? How dare you, I ask. How dare you.

Fehnix said...

Well, see, it usually happens like this:

You turn on your comp, or somet type of comp, it has to be connected to the net of course, and then, you log in to blogger.com, then you write a post, and then you plubish the bastard.

Usually it works, and usually it takes more steps than that, but I am sure you are able to understand from the highlights, that, is how you do it.

Oh, btw, that post had me laughing harder than I will admit *smirk*.